Well, I'm a bit upset.
I've had this writer's block for the longest time, right?
And that, combined with a complete lack of free time, forged a dry spell I couldn't break out of for the life of me.
Today, like, 5 minutes ago, it broke.
I came up with "Lights go out". A new story that could've or could've not been a part of the larger story I had been writing.
However, the only thing you'll know about "Lights go out" is the title.
As it turns out, lights did go out somewhere in Adminland 'cause it was never published.
"Submit" didn't really submit it.

Um, I'd never trash Tori. She's been too good to me to even consider that.
I will, however, trash her marketing staff or whomever was responsible for that VIP thing!
We were all kinda disappointed by the content (or the lack of it) in our gift bags. But, hey, it's still just a gift bag, right? Who cares? The real deal was to witness soundcheck and, for some, meet Tori.

So, just wanted to share with you my last completely-surreal-yet-it-seems-totally-normal-at-the-time dream.
I dreamt Tori came to my house! Major LOL!
So, there we were at some M&G or something, and then suddenly - as it so often happens in dreams - we ended up in my bedroom making small-talk ('cause even in my dreams, I'm still starstruck by T). Conversation turned more relaxed and buddy-like, I was amazed by how down-to-earth she was, so I decided to ask her something.

Ok, here goes, as featured on Undented, if it ever gets posted
Well, with a little last-minute editing
I give you the final version of my "Tori made me stupid" story. Enjoy!

***

I guess it's not that bad, Tori's used to all this! But I felt like such a moron.

So last night I was feeling pretty anxious about life.
Somehow it felt like I've been waiting for something to start, for life to begin, whatever.
I don't know. I couldn't sleep.
I had a smoke by the bedroom window (which I don't do anymore), talked to myself.
Then relaxed (or tried to) to some Regina Spektor...
It was a long night.
I don't know what that was about.

Stupid bipolar disorder...

... but, I do wish you much happiness and love.
I'm a Grinch and I don't do christmas, but that will not prevent me from sending big hugs and kisses your way!!
Now, don't be confused, I ain't doing this 'cause it's christmas! I'm doing it because I want to! Although, I do admit that everyone's more open to the idea of sending love this time a year! hihihi
So, my wishlist for you:
Be well. Be safe. Love. Hate. Eat a lot. Drink a lot. Kiss. f***. Fight. Make up. Make out. Party. Rest. Enjoy. Live.
Hey, anything but work!
To torture a cliché... Happy Holidays!

Humming.
Humming.
Hurting.
But not really.
Waiting.
But not really.
I hum...

I can't believe it's been a month since that first show...
A whole month...
I wonder how long it's gonna be 'til I see Tori again...
Or my friends...
Hopefully it won't be that long.
I remember you all
I'm sending all my love through this keyboard onto your screens!

"Life is random". I still remember Leia's face, her smile, holding that ad up to my camera. She was making a point, I'm sure, but I missed it. Leia's "points" were as random as life. I thought nothing of it then. "Life is random". Why, yes, it is, but that's not news to anybody. It's not even an intelligent remark, it's just another cliché. Well, I didn't know it then, but random doesn't even begin to cover it. The power of a split second is remarkable. The power of decision. Being at the wrong place at the wrong time isn't necessarily what makes tables turn.

Met him in a hotel, met him in a hotel, high off ground...
Tell me why he's missing... Tell me this one's also for Lollipop Gestapo...
He was wild... where is he now?
He was wild... where is he now?
Give me more... can't you just give me more?
I have to learn to let you crash down.
I have to learn to let you, heart, crash down.
I have to learn to let you crash.
Kissed him in a hotel, touched him in a hotel
And he was the biggest thing there's been any year,
but I knew what I was seeking,
what I was seeking wasn't there.